a flag in yer ass

2004-02-27 - 2:20 p.m.

right now i'm listening to the renholder mix of a perfect circle's 'judith' at the exact same time that my older sister is at the nearby movie theatre watching 'the passion.'

and that's funny.

i try to take michael moore's advice and not watch the news, but sometimes i do, and i read the paper, and i learn what's happening currently in politics with gay marriages and abortion rights and movies about jesus. and that's funny, too, but in a 'this sucks so bad all you can do is smile numbly at everything'. and nader's joining the race again. fuck you, nader. just fuck you. i love you, i'd love to vote for you, but fuck you for being even a small part in getting that goddamn moron bush into office, and if you help him get into office again, i'll never fucking vote for you, ever, ever, ever, no matter what your politics are.

it's so fucked up. for maybe the first time in my life i can see why people join the army. sometimes when something that you believe is so right is being threatened, you don't wanna sit there letter writing, you wanna be out there fighting for it. and if i thought that i could change anything by quitting my job and running around the country joining every protest and march for gay rights and women's rights and religious rights that i could find, i'd do it. but i really don't think that would do anything. i'm just one of those people that reads shit in the paper and gets really upset and in a bad mood for a week until i stop reading the papers and become oblivious again. americans are blamed for being oblivious, but sometimes you have to numb yourself or you'll explode.

every time i watch 'bowling for columbine' i want to move to canada. just stop fighting, let the wealthy white male conservatives take over completely with their regime. and if it weren't so damn cold up there, i just might do that.

maybe i could just buy a large plot of warm land and establish my own commune with gay marriages and abortion clinics and every type of religious temple as far as the eye can see!

sigh. i just, i just don't understand why straight people feel so threatened by gay people, why rich people feel so threatened by poor people, why male people feel so threatened by female people, why christian people feel so threatened by non-christian people, and why white people feel so threatened by just about everyone who isn't white.

sweeping generalizations, i know, but as untrue as they are in certain instances, they become all too true in others. why the fear? why the need for control? what are we so afraid is gonna happen? if women have the right to choose what happens to their own bodies, will the human race die out because every woman then decides to get an abortion? no. if gays have the right to get married, will straight marriages become less important? no. if everyone's not christian, will god destroy the earth tomorrow? no. besides, if all us non-christians are going to hell, what do the christians care anyways? then they can have heaven allllll to themselves.

i'm feeling pissed off, ineffectual, and disgusted with the present state of affairs. maybe it's all that goddamn country music they play at work. if i have to hear that fucking idiotic 'boot in yer ass' song one more goddamn time, i'm taking the next flight to mexico and drowning out my sorrows in all the mexican beer i can swill.

fucking fucker fuckies.